Jane's Story

No Time for Breast Cancer

If a fortune teller had told me that in October 2001, at the age of 45, I'd be diagnosed with breast cancer and would have a mastectomy and chemotherapy, I would've asked for my money back.

None of us ever expect to get breast cancer. We all know the statistics, but we don't often think, 'I might be that one woman in every ten'. Our lives are too busy, futures are planned. Sometimes we imagine this hectic pace might keep serious illness at bay - we simply haven't time to get breast cancer. My life was a frantic one prior to diagnosis - pressured and always busy. I think the unrelenting stress may indeed have contributed to the development of my cancer.

We're well informed about the disease in New Zealand because unfortunately, we have one of the highest rates in the world. Like most women, I knew the facts but still considered myself immune from it. For me, it was as much about fear as ignorance. I didn't want to think about getting it - it was just too horrible to contemplate. When breast cancer did arrive with all the calamity of a bull in a china shop, I was so shocked, so taken aback, that the disbelief lingered for a long time. My surgeon said it would take me about two years to fully realise what had happened to me and she was right.

There's a line we know so well: Early detection is your best defence against breast cancer. I've heard those words my entire adult life so started having regular mammograms and ultrasound when I was 41. If the fortune teller had added the advice, 'Always get a second opinion', I'd now be more than happy to pay for her wisdom.

I went to the same radiologists every year. They saw calcifications, cysts, and year after year, said, 'There's nothing to worry about'. At times I felt like getting a second opinion and now I wish I had. In August 2001, there was discharge and a rock-hard lump in my left breast but they still sent me home with the words, 'If it doesn't go away, call us back.' Fortunately, I had enough wisdom of my own by then to know things weren't right, so I referred myself to a breast specialist and now have my mammograms at the radiology clinic next door to her.

So there have been lessons learned but new life skills gained. The journey has been harrowing at times, strangely rewarding at others. These days, cancer and I seem to have reached a balance. It's been evicted for now but the memory lingers, hanging out on the other end of the seesaw. Progress has been made because we're on the level more often these days. I can look cancer in the eye and not worry so much about it tipping me up or down. I'm living a better life than before. I feel wiser, more spiritual, calmer. I've reassessed those things I thought were important to me. Now I have a whole new set of priorities. No more management jobs! I work part time and write more too. I've published my first book, 'Welcome to the Amazon Club', and am working on a second.

Every day holds far more happiness and beauty. These things were there before; I simply failed to see or take time to enjoy them. Now I make sure I have enough time in my day to notice even the simplest things, like the way the sea looks on a fine, bright morning, the scent of the first winter flowers on my daphne and the taste of a warm date scone and a cup of tea.

Jane's Story

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